Birds: they’re regal, sleek and love to drop deuces on innocent children.
At around 9:00 p.m. last Friday, a total of 17 people standing near Sleeping Beauty’s Castle in Disneyland had to be escorted to a private restroom after getting covered in goose juice. How fowl!
The event has been classified as one of the biggest fly-by turdings in American history.
So fowl play was not suspected?
— Chris Klosowski (@cklosowski) June 10, 2017
A hazardous clean-up crew investigated and the 6 sh*t-smeared kids and 11 adults and reportedly appeared “healthy and happy” after being given a change of clothes. I’m guessing this assessment is either an exaggeration or the guests were bribed with more than a private changing area and new threads. Money for the kids and sexual favors for the adults from a mascot of their choice?
Also free umbrellas and passes to Universal Studios, a place where you get to indulge in fun without having your children get sloshed by turds or eaten by alligators.