Man Calls Police To Report Stolen Blunts


Cops in Indian River County, FL were alerted via telephone that someone had broken into a man’s home and stolen his phone, five dollars in quarters and all his precious blunts.

A part of me feels kind of bad for him. Because of all the patience and saliva, rolling blunts once you finally acquire weed (in a state where recreational marijuana isn’t legal, no less) can be very annoying. He spent hundreds of seconds licking all those blunt wraps to perfection just to come home to all of his hard work tossed down the drain then turns to the police for help and, as usual, they let him down.

The police, on the other hand, had a much better time

“Usually we have to actually search for criminals. On a good day, they call us.”

Dude must have smoked at least one of those blunts before the police got there because it sounds like he left the door unlocked and allowed the thief to stroll right in.

The victim said he left and returned to find the back door open.

A neighbor, who was very helpful describing the suspect, told deputies he saw a light-skinned black male in his 20’s, wearing red basketball shorts under jeans, and white shoes with no shirt on, walking out of the woods near the address.

“I did not observe any signs of forced entry to the door,” the deputy said. “I did not observe any signs of rummaging through, nor did I observe any signs of exit.”

Via Sebastian Daily

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